Mehwidge

Do I have a fucking sign on my back? Is there a sign back there that says, "please, I am in desperate need to be fixed up?" If there is, please disregard it, and tell your friends. I find that since moving out to Mormon country, everybody I work with or encounter talks about how great it is to be married and how I need to go out and get a wife. Tonight, in fact.

Now don't get me wrong. I am not anti-marriage. I just don't think its necessary for a human being to be attached in co-dependency as soon as fucking possible. I've gotten this for years from my mother and grandma, and bless their hearts, I have nothing against them saying it. But when Milton across five feet of granite says, "Ben, we need to get you a wife. That way you'd always wake up on time." Really? Really Milton? Is that why I need a wife? So I can have a fifth alarm clock? To have someone in the morning with their foot in their back saying, "you need to get up and go to work." Yeah? You need to go fuck yourself. I work sixty hours a week. I think I can show up at nine once.

And now that I've mentioned stupid things said by my coworker, lets move on to the always popular "we need to get you on American Idol, Ben." Thats the last thing in the world I want. I don't want to go up in front of millions of people and be berated by some British bastard. Another Miltonism I hate: "Is your hat on backwards or is your head on backwards?" That's not even funny Milt.

But I digress. I think that given the right circumstances and the right phase of life, a good marriage can be a beautiful thing. But neither of those criteria apply to me right now. So please give it a rest.

Dramatic Media Review: Carnivále

This was a fantastic series. And just to give some idea of the scope of the series. If one were to take the TV show Heroes, and the two books: The Grapes of Wrath, and The Holy Bible, and stick them all in a blender the end result just might be Carnivále. The imagery and editing leave one with the feelings of must having been to a good "burly-q" from the 1930's. The storyline grows through the two seasons at a pretty steady clip and gives the inevitable confrontation between good and bad avatars ample time to decant. And the confusion of good and evil in every character of the movie shows the very strong 'human' element that these carnies seem to have.

That all being said, I must warn as many people as possible not to watch this ABOMINATION of American cinema. And now, I'm going to do you a favor... I don't often do this, but I'm going to save you the trouble of ever seeing this show. I'm going to tell you how it ends. That should be enough "heads-up" babbling for those of you who don't really want to know the ending to have stopped reading so....

Ben kills Brother Justin in the corn field outside of New Canaan. But Sofie finds out that she is the product of Brother Justin raping her mother. Sofie becomes the Omega and shoots Jonesy. Now, we don't know that he's dead as the last we see of him, he slumps against a wall staring at Sofie. The nest scene we find that Ben is still alive but unconscious. And roll the credits.... I'm not kidding. They didn't even attempt to wrap up the story.

This was SO disappointing with Carnivále especially because it was extraordinarily well made. The production value felt hefty. The story was interesting and moved along well. And then they just took the piss at the end of season 2. How disappointing! I'm going to have to regroup before starting another HBO series.

Scotch Review #1: Lagavulin

"Let me not to the marriage of true minds
Admit impediments. Love is not love
Which alters when it alteration finds..."
~Sonnet 116, William Shakespeare

Color: Dark Amber/ Bronze
Nose: Rich, aromatic, and complex, with gunsmoke, and trawler ropes. Cigar smoke.
Body: Full
Palate: Highly complex. Dried seaweed, perfumed smoke.
Finish: Very long. Smoke, stewed tea.

The Opinion:
I must admit, that since the beginning of my endeavors with Scotch that Lagavulin has been my ever fixéd mark by which I have judged all others. However, my latest experience left me wanting. I am not yet ready to take Lagavulin off of the pedestal on which I have placed it, but it did not stand out amongst the Islay Malts as I remember.

The nose was extraordinary as ever. Particularly, I enjoyed the gunsmoke as compared to the "smokes" of the other South Islays. The palate was pleasurable but I was able to distinguish the seaweed more than I have in the past. Whereas before it was an unnamed quality, this time when the seaweed element stood out, I felt, it mitigated the experience. The finish was once again enchanting and provided for a pleasant evening. Overall, I give it an 8.5.

From the Steps of the Rostra

In the words of Pericles, "all good things should flow into the boulevard."

As I believe in the majority of my opinions, I feel that to have an open, but not overwhelming venue of a public forum would be beneficial to me and all those involved. Having said that, I've tried to create a blog before, but abandoned it due to lack of sufficient interest. I've always felt "who the hell cares about my opinion anyway," but this time I come into it with broader intentions. And that is to give those who desire it the occasion to find out more about me. With this in mind, know that I will not be striving to be conciliatory, politically correct, or what I would otherwise consider "less than". I will however endeavor to be consistently witty, but to treat serious matters with the proper respect.

I wish this to be a public forum and hope that my opinions will spark creativity and impassioned debate. I also reserve the right to throw off of the Tarpeian Rock, anyone I see fit. This will not be a diary, per se. I find the day to day occurrences of the human experience a matter for the plebs, and having no place in the work of scholarship.

Now the stage is set. Let the players to their positions.